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  Lindsey didn’t like being told what to do. “I haven’t done anything wrong, Mr. Schuessler.”

  She heard a little snort of derision through the phone. “That remains to be seen. An investigation into TLN and your ethics as a producer wouldn’t make you very…shall we say attractive to future employers?”

  They were practically blackmailing her. Lindsey bit her bottom lip to keep from telling him what she really thought. She certainly didn’t want any blowback on the network. None of this was TLN’s fault.

  “May I be blunt?” Schuessler asked.

  The audacity! “Be my guest,” Lindsey said, not masking her sarcasm.

  “Miss Northington herself has requested that you cease all contact with her.”

  Just like Reagan. Lindsey stood in stunned silence. She squeezed her eyes shut, struggling to steel herself, grappling to not let him hear the hurt in her voice. “You tell her she has nothing to worry about from me.”

  She couldn’t hit the End Call button fast enough.

  In spite of everything, it had happened to her again. She’d risked her emotions with someone unattainable. She’d known she was diving in head-first. She’d known how it would end. She wanted to kick herself. Hard.

  “Fuck,” she said under her breath. But at least she’d done the right thing. At least she still had her dignity. She might have fucked up. But she hadn’t used someone she cared about to claw her way to the top.

  But none of that offered her any solace. For the first time in a long time, she realized she wanted a relationship, a soft place to fall, a partner and lover.

  No. It wasn’t just those attributes. She wanted Ella.

  Now Ella was gone.

  Chapter Five

  Six months later

  “How’s that?” the makeup artist asked as she stepped back so that Ella could see her reflection in the mirror.

  She looked older in spite of her years. Seasoned.

  No. At peace.

  She turned from side to side. She’d have to remember this eye shadow trick. “Nice. Thank you.”

  One of the assistant producers for Global Now tapped on the open door. He glanced at his clipboard and then back up. “Five minutes, Miss Northington.”

  “Good luck,” the makeup artist said as she removed the drape protecting Ella’s navy suit and then disappeared from the room.

  Ella nodded and drew in a deep breath. Going against her father’s publicist, she’d done a whirlwind of appearances, speeches, and talk shows since being outed. At first she had wanted solitude but after Natalie and the Femme Coalition’s generous donation for cystic fibrosis research, Ella realized she finally had the platform she needed to bring awareness to the disease.

  In addition, she’d taken on another cause. LGBT rights. Even her father—after a certain amount of soul-searching—fired his publicist and began working within his party as an advocate for LGBT rights. Espousing moderate and fair policies, he’d been elected hands down over his opponent.

  The pageant that had practically launched her career as a spokesperson for LGBT issues now seemed far in the past, even though it had only been six months. Marquita had deservedly won. Chelsea had come in runner-up and then had been forced to give up her position after making a public slur against gays. Ella hadn’t looked back—with one exception.

  Not a night passed that she didn’t recall the joy she’d found in Lindsey’s arms. She’d picked up her phone to call Lindsey a thousand times, but indecision and doubt had swamped her before she’d been able to hit Send. Instead Ella had waited for a call.

  A call that never came.

  Perhaps Lindsey had merely been climbing the success ladder. Part of Ella didn’t want to know if that were the case.

  A soft rap on the door caught her attention and she turned, expecting the young male producer to alert her it was time to go on.

  But her lips parted in surprise. Standing in the doorway was Lindsey as Ella had never seen her.

  Her spiky hair had been styled in a short yet far more sophisticated look. She wore adorable black-rimmed glasses and minimal makeup. Without her piercings, she looked like a sexy businesswoman instead of a punk rocker. A dark suit hugged her body, giving her the illusion of feminine curves. A tribal tat winding around her calf was the only edgy thing that reminded Ella of the old Lindsey. Well, that—and the killer pair of bright-blue Louboutins.

  Even in a skirt, Lindsey’s alpha-female sexuality caused a swirl of desire to warm Ella from the inside out.

  Lindsey pushed her glasses up on her nose. “Hi, princess.”

  Ella’s heart hammered against her ribcage. She gave Lindsey a demure smile as all the moments they’d spent making love rushed back over her in a sweltering torrent. “I wouldn’t have recognized you.”

  “Yeah, I know,” Lindsey said. “But they expect me to look professional and all.”

  Ella laced her own fingers together to keep her hands from shaking. “Where are you working?”

  “Here. I’m the executive producer. Turns out standing up for myself wasn’t a career-killer after all.”

  “Congratulations.” Oh dear Lord, this was so awkward. All Ella really wanted to do was launch herself into Lindsey’s arms and kiss her.

  “I…I sort of quit TLN.”

  “Sort of quit? When?” Ella hadn’t even watched the show when it aired. She’d never known.

  “There really wasn’t much sort of to it. I quit that day—after I refused to continue filming.” Lindsey lowered her lashes. Damn, she was so beautiful. “About what happened…”

  “Don’t explain,” Ella blurted, the idea of Lindsey quitting her job turning over and over in her head.

  “I need to.” Lindsey shook her head. “Ella, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. We…I should have been more careful. I should have never kissed you in the hall like that. I should have realized one of those catty bitches would be waiting to strike and take full advantage of it.”

  Ella pursed her lips. “I think on some level I wanted to come out. It was the only way it could have happened for me. I don’t regret it.”

  “Good,” Lindsey said. Her shoulders dropped as if she’d released a heavy weight. “Because I’ve regretted it every day. I wanted to call you. I tried several times, but I was afraid you’d blame me. And…well, I didn’t want to go against your wishes and seem like some sort of lame stalker.”

  “Against my wishes?” Ella asked. “What do you mean?”

  “That Schuessler fucker.”

  Realization made Ella’s stomach twist. “He called you?”

  “Practically threatened me.”

  Ella let out a sigh. “I’m sorry. I wish I’d known. My dad fired him and if it makes you feel any better, he’s doing a sixty-day stint for a second DUI.”

  Lindsey smiled. “Karma’s a bitch.”

  Ella stood. God, her knees were shaking. “I wouldn’t have been happy going back to north Georgia and becoming a schoolteacher. I would have hated it. I didn’t want to live a lie anymore. I…I was planning to tell you when the pageant was over.”

  Lindsey’s eyes darkened. “You were?”

  Ella nodded. “I know how we left things…I know what we discussed—that you weren’t really interested in a relationship, but—”

  Lindsey interrupted. “All I’ve been able to think about is you.”

  Ella couldn’t take a breath. “Me too.” She blinked against hot tears. She searched frantically for a tissue.

  Lindsey crossed the small room, pulled one out of the box and handed it to her. Their hands brushed and their fingers flirted. “What do you say, princess? Want to try this for real?”

  Searching Lindsey’s eyes, Ella swallowed thickly. Everything she’d ever wanted was possible for her because of this woman. She could think of nothing she wanted more than exploring a real relationship with her. “Starting now,” Ella whispered as she took that kiss she’d been wanting without so much as a care for her expertly applied lipstick.

&n
bsp; About Paisley Smith

  Paisley Smith is a full time freelance writer and can usually be found in front of her computer writing, chatting, promoting or plotting.

  A true southern belle, Paisley enjoys all things feminine, such as the perfect shade of lipstick, a pair of killer heels and a sexy, confident woman.

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  Also by Paisley Smith

  Beyond Curious

  Birthday Girl

  Bitten in the Big Easy anthology

  Charmed in the Big Easy anthology

  First Taste

  Nurse Lovette

  Purr

  Soft Swap

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  Beauty and the Butch

  ISBN 9781419947476

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  Beauty and the Butch Copyright © 2013 Paisley Smith

  Edited by Julie Naughton

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  Cover photography by Litwin/shutterstock.com

  Electronic book publication August 2013

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